MY kids are seeing how much time and money he took from us. MY family tells me to quit investigating and finish the divorce. I’m at that point, my goal was to have my kids understand they can’t hide things from their spouses, and now i’ve hit that goal, as they all see this now. FOr me, it’s been the biggest awakening, war and shock of my day. I’m still in cptsd and fibromayalsia, but i’m certain these will resolve once the family home is sold and i’m in my own home near my family, several cities away. I think it is extraordinarily disputing for infants of a narcissist parent. THe healthy partner will at last cut off all contact, but the kids will have some sort of a tie with their mother or father for the duration. THere are many reasons for the babes to cancel from the parent, but circumstances surface that will require decisions from time to time. IT puts huge stirring strain on them and with much support, they are able to wrestle with this serious mental illness their parent feels. I lived this life and it was a chronic dare that was met with many emotionally charged positions. FIrst i want to thank you all for sharing this topic. I never realized there was a term for sensing this kind of abuse. I am a survivor as well. I did encounter boughts of panic and anxiety, melancholy, and the junctures anxiety are now few and far between. MY anxous echoes occur now only when he aims to contact me. HE in fact called me out of the blue from another number to tell me that his phone was being serviced and not to attempt to contact him!I had been in no contact for months!REading this article helped to validate my beliefs and answers to having experienced this affiliation. NOw that i know what it was, i can recognize the pattern, commit to and be congenial with “no contact”, and carry on to heal. I will also now might help feel these cases suffering from this and help refer them to therapists discriminating in this measure. ROse, while it’s counter intuitive, take heart from the fact that, because it’s never been about you, you are not going to may save him. YOu, and your true self, are not really ‘present’ for him, so you are not prone either. WHat you need to do is to take care of your own happiness, peace of mind and health. TAking liability for your own life is the best and only way for you to to live, and for him to learn to respect you. FAlling into a caretaker role will only change you in ways that will do you no good. STop caretaking the borderline or narcissist: how to end the drama and get on with life, by margalis fjelstad, is a fanciful book that will empower you and all others dealing with narcissists. SUch advised and heartfelt comments figuring so much pain. ROll on royal committee and hope the feers are as extraordinary as the rc into organization abuse at the moment increased to handle the depth and bredth of such a societal scourge. ACknowledgment and appreciation of all types of abuse by those in power and weild power over others wil assist healing and the likeliness of retrieving singular power once again. NExt royal commission needs to be focused on naming and shaming narcs and their organisations who harbour and hire the narcs to do a job on personnel. ALl power to you who recognise and exit the person power drain of pathological narcs. ALice: i had never come across the idea that failing to mature much beyond 13 years old emotionally. THis helps me like how i regularly allowed myself to take answerability for their irresponsible behavior.
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