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CAn anyone tell me what it means?I think this all part of his game. HE has to have narcissistic supply, whether that it positive or opposed – he just needs to know that he is having an effect on you of some sort and he will only get that if you give a retort. AT the moment he is testing the waters to see if he can worm his way back into your life. OF course, he doesn’t know that he is in your head night and day and that his message has caused unconditional disorder for you – if he gets any idea that has transpired, he will get his narcissistic supply from that. IF you reply with something heartening, he may well attempt to get back into your life substantially including mentally. YOu may have seen this article but it characterizes quite well the cycle. THenarcissisticpersonality. COm/hoover manuver/ the only thing you can do is to positively ignore this man’s accosts and try to move your life in a direction where you can just forget him, very hard, i know. PErhaps there is someone else on this forum with similar experiences to mira who can advise her that this will work?HI milly,there’s no dare that no contact is the answer to eluding any kind of confusion they love to provide. ZAri ballard who has written the most fabulous pieces on narcissists describes that the reasons they hoover is to preserve supply in case of need and also to ensure the victim never moves on from the pain they caused. THis could well be the answer to my itemize case. I’m so sad for all the pain and undergoing good unsophisticated people are being caused. I can only reiterate what the experts say to go no or minimal contact – the latter for when infants are concerned. I think i’m able to do this myself now, finally. STrength and resovle to us all to cut contact with the nightmare in order that healing be possible. HIi’m 21 years old. I just came out of a affiliation with a 35 year old narcissitic man. IT was awful. AT first i felt like a queen. AS time flew by things became bad. ALthough i blame myself because i should have left a long time ago. I’m very young i’ve been thru a lot he saw a chance to take advantage . HE has lied about his whole life, later finding out he has a lover of 8years. HE also blamed me for that, for his girl finding out. EVen thought she called me. I never knew of her. I went all summer without talking to this man. I was indecent all summer. SPent weeks in my room. I lost my job. I freshly got a new job on sunday.
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I feel for her!AS a child, you can’t even imagine the thought that a parent can really behave so selfishly. BUt,my advice to your daughter would be to do some mental imagery with her. I have 3 teenagers and, i would advise you to have someone other than himself do this with her unless she still beholds you and asks for your advice ok, when she is training to spend time with her father even if it’s just a 15 min visit have her sit in a chair with her eyes closed. HAve her pretend that she has a zipper instantly over her heart. NOw, have her unzip that zipper and reach in and grab her tender heart, which holds all of her feelings and her self esteem. THen have her place this heart in a safe and lock it up. ONly she knows the mixture to get her heart out of the safe. THen explain to her that while her body is going to be with her father, all of her feelings and self esteem are locked tightly in that safe. SHe can’t get her sensations hurt if they are safe and inviolably locked away. SHe can recover her self esteem and feelungs when she is home and in a safe place. THis is effective. I hope it will help you ;when the opportunites arise, let her know how special she is, let her know where you see her strengths, and how she could build on her abilities, and that you will love her and accept her through aught. THe most important thing here is her self image, and have her not fall into co habituation. MY 20 yr. OLd son moved in with his covert narcissistic dad, and in one week came back stating anyone in that house are liars. IN the last year he has debated with me about his connections.
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HIi’m 21 years old. I just came out of a alliance with a 35 year old narcissitic man. IT was terrible. AT first i felt like a queen. AS time flew by things became bad. ALthough i blame myself because i should have left a long time ago. I’m very young i’ve been thru a lot he saw a chance to take advantage . HE has lied about his whole life, later finding out he has a girl of 8years. HE also blamed me for that, for his girl finding out. EVen thought she called me. I never knew of her. I went all summer without talking to this man. I was dejected all summer. SPent weeks in my room. I lost my job. I recently got a new job on sunday.

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