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YOu can change your for and emotions aroound this, make your own judgments based on what skills you can develope to deflect hurtful projections and manage to have some connection with your grandies…. ALl power to you. REmember what they say and do mimics what is about them and not you. YOu might like to imagine a mirror between her and you so whatever hurtful handling etc is given out bounces back at the narc, and is not amalgamated into your loving self. YOga can also help that self invigorating, focussing on the inner nurturer, only apt for one self and accepting that change comes from within and what is around us just is and not our answerability. HOpe this helps. FRom reading this n what anyone is saying im guessing my ex/lover what he is in my life is at narcissist. HE has been in my life for 3yrs kno. ANd for the 1st yr everything was ok we had our ups n downs but we worked them thru. HE lost his father n then his friend n then things changed. CHeating, lien, i feel used. I try to leave n get out but i feel lost with out him i don’t kno what to do. I have changed my number 2 times n he txt or calls or email n i fall into it. I changed my n its like a drug to have to talk to him. I dont kno why i even think he can change, it kills me inside. HE don’t see the pain he is causing me. I need help to get out of it n not fall back but i dont know how :im marveling if i had the hoover manuover done on me!I’m sure my ex is a narcissist!I dumped him after another tantrum in which involved me called be police and later him blaming me!FOr months he sent love songs, texts even flowers, never had flowers even after our kids were born, no note though with them!OFfered me coffee, takeaways etc etc, then quickly he’s got a girl friend and she’s moved in with him!WOw not even implanted her to the kids!THen the random stuff begins, once maybe twice a month a email of nothing but a jar of sweets or aught else!THen social media, the endless pics of them posing looking so happy!THen the texts telling me he met a famous guy at the weekend!?YEs and ?YOu’ve got a girl friend so why text me?IT’s been 5 mths since then as i ignored anybody he sent me and he’s gone positively silent!I was questioning if he was trying to fix me or perchance triangulate?I married him. WAs tired of the roller coaster and wanted it to stop. I thought if i brought dependability to his life – composition, etc. HE’d thrive. 3 l/2 yrs ago. THen the real abuse started. RAther than understand my grants – he took edges of me and escalated his demands. HE imperiled to smash in my face, took up with another woman when out of town and i was having surgery, was neglectful, never gave me a dime – had to beg for grocery money – and the kicker. THe last straw… mother’s day and he deliberately refused to admit me. I told him if he disrespected me one more time – i was out the door.
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THen the real abuse started. RAther than like my presents – he took gains of me and escalated his demands. HE jeopardized to smash in my face, took up with another woman when out of town and i was having surgery, was neglectful, never gave me a dime – had to beg for grocery money – and the kicker. THe last straw… mother’s day and he deliberately refused to admit me. I told him if he disrespected me one more time – i was out the door. I left. FOr good. HE was sucking the life out of me. HE’d taken something from me. EVerything. BUt the one thing he will never take is my soul. HE was killing my spirit. I was tired, muddled, sad, lonely, lone, and ignored. BRoke up mother’s day. MOved back to the house i still owned that my girls was living in. NO contact. I am going to be 66 yrs old. I don’t know why i could ever believe that someone else’s pleasure/welfare was more vital than my own. I apologize to me for abusing me. I am collectable. I am lovable.
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THere are many reasons for the youngsters to undo from the parent, but circumstances surface that will require rulings from time to time. IT puts enormous stirring strain on them and with much support, they are able to wrestle with this serious mental illness their parent fingers. I lived this life and it was a chronic defy that was met with many emotionally charged locations. FIrst i want to thank you all for sharing this topic. I never applied there was a term for fingering this kind of abuse. I am a endurer as well. I did experience boughts of panic and anxiety, dejection, and the episodes anxiety are now few and far between. MY anxous reactions occur now only when he attempts to contact me. HE truly called me out of the blue from another number to tell me that his phone was being serviced and not to attempt to contact him!I had been in no contact for months!REading this article helped to validate my sensations and echoes to having experienced this relationship. NOw that i know what it was, i can mark the pattern, commit to and be accordant with “no contact”, and abide to heal. I will also now may help identify these patients pain from this and help refer them to therapists individualizing in this dosage. ROse, though it’s counter intuitive, take heart from the fact that, because it’s never been about you, you are not going to be able to save him. YOu, and your true self, are not really ‘present’ for him, so you are not responsible either. WHat you need to do is to take care of your own pleasure, peace of mind and health. TAking responsibility for your own life is the best and only way for you to to live, and for him to learn to respect you. FAlling into a caretaker role will only change you in ways that will do you no good. STop caretaking the borderline or narcissist: how to end the drama and get on with life, by margalis fjelstad, is a fabulous book that will empower you and all others dealing with narcissists. SUch premeditated and heartfelt explains portraying so much pain. ROll on royal assignments and hope the feers are as amazing as the rc into elementary abuse presently expanded to manipulate the depth and bredth of such a societal scourge. ACknowledgment and esteem of all types of abuse by those in power and weild power over others wil assist healing and the likelihood of retrieving distinct power once again. NExt royal appoints needs to be focused on naming and shaming narcs and their organisations who harbour and hire the narcs to do a job on personnel.
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IT was a huge burden. I want 2 be around secure folks, not folks that have issues, and want to use me for any they need. 1 of my friends wanted me to give her some of my son’s child support because she was short. THe answer was no. ALl the excuses will conquer you if you let it when they can’t use you for what they need and what age does a person need 2 be when they are a fully functioning adult that is likely for their own life?I used 2 wonder why don’t they just go do what they need himself?NOt in a current relationship and i love it. DOn’t have male friends anymore either. PEople want 2 hang out if they can use you 2 get article, diversely how many out of the blue folks call you consistently because they value you as a woman and a friend?IN order 4 me 2 go out and hang with anyone they have 2 be absolutely 100% fully functioning adult that wants devotion from me only, no loans 4 $, no wanting 2 borrow my car 2 drive because their car is conveniently in the garage and they can’t afford 2 get it out. GEtting in a affiliation with a man that has kids and wants me 2 raise his kids, not business. I wonder isn’t anyone accountable for their life herself?I’m happy being single. I have no regrets i don’t date. I afresh broke up from a draining relationship with a narcissist and i’ve been there for almost two years. LOst 22 pounds and i was already thin before… it is not the first time i assayed do leave him and i was partly alert of what was happening when we got back concurrently last time. I have strong feeling for him and i wanted to make sure i was doing all i could to make things work. IN the process, i almost lost my mind and the weigh loss on the last five months was the red line for me. I always told him that if i was obliged to choose between my love for him and my love for myself, i would not hesitate in election me and the time came when i had to quit the journey. I wish him the best and i think he needs love like any other human been but i have no more energy for it, though i love him. THat makes things hard do whip since he doesn’t leave space to breath but my mind is made up. BEing sensible of what could happen when i got back to him last time, helped me to not dissolve myself in the process. IT is very essential for aught in life that you don’t doubt yourself besides healthy self doubt which helps to evolve and always trust your guts. THough people can change, it is imperative to label what needs change and that seems impossible to a narcissist. EVen so, i feel sorry for him because i believe he suffers and i see no way for him to conquer pleasure in life.

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I just want to forget it ever happened. I’ve been married to a narcissist sociopath for 13 yrs. SO much damage has been done but i’m rebuilding. I started the no contact but we have a child concurrently and are not divorced or legally separated yet. THe threats of taking my son and the very few things i have left have me living in fear. HE fools all around him into for i’m an awful person when all i ever tried to do was help him. HE is a sick and twisted man i don’t want my son to be ducked in by his disception. WHat do i do?I work hard but barely make ends meet. ARe there any ways to make this easier, for i can’t handle anymore of his abuse?I keep reading the commentaries on here and i didn’t mention the adultery his bizarre sex request and his drug abuse that he blames whole on. HE’s fooled everybody for years saying he’s clean and getting sympathy from, i call them his chearleaders by making it look like im not consciousness of his addiction and i’m making it hard on him. I’ve stood by him through yrs of rehab when he would hook up with all these young girls there. I think to him it felt like he was in college. HE would beg and cry to come come home, naturally i took him but yet i don’t enjoy whatever and i am the bad one when now i’m living with my parents and my two boys and when he met me i owned my own home and my vehicle out righthad wonderful credit now i’m commencing from zero and he still is haunting my life. MY sister is a narcissist who has caused me, and my husband, a lot of grief. FOr some time, without us realizing, she told lies about us to the others in the family who believed her even though i was at last able to prove she was wrong. SHe also maligned us both behind our backs – we’re not sure how far this has travelled but have seen some evidence from family members not acknowledging gifts and not inviting us to events when we might have due to be. LUckily we live a long way off so don’t have to see her, except that my mother is elderly and still needs our support. SIs is jealous because she lives near to mom so has to do more to look after her whilst i do what i can, calling and having mom to stay when likely, as well as phoning every day and helping with her money. BUt she has nationwide, to my other brethren, unjustifiably accused me of not doing enough to help and is winding them up to agree with her nastiness. IN the pause, when she is is the mood, she is sweetness and light, pretending that nothing has happened and that all is well, hoovering away to keep in with me. IT’s hard to understand that someone can be so nasty without any motive or avenge and then just switch on the charm the next day.

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THey have begun to address these needs through organisations such as pci dss and the secure pos vendor affiliation. MAny credit card consumers receive rewards, such as frequent flyer points, gift documents, or cash back as an incentive to use the card. REwards are commonly tied to buy an item or service on the card, which may or may not include balance transfers, cash advances, or other special uses. DEpending on the type of card, rewards will commonly cost the issuer between 0. 25% and 2. 0% of the spread. NEtworks such as visa or mastercard have augmented their fees to allow issuers to fund their rewards system. SOme issuers discourage recovery by forcing the cardholder to call customer service for rewards. ON their servicing website, redeeming awards is usually a feature that is very well hidden by the issuers. WIth a fractured and competitive atmosphere, rewards points cut melodramatically into an issuer’s bottom line, and rewards points and related incentives must be carefully managed to ensure a profitable folder. UNlike unused gift cards, in whose case the breakage in certain us states goes to the state’s banks, unredeemed credit card points are grasped by the issuer. IN relative numbers the values lost in bank card fraud are minor, calculated in 2006 at 7 cents per 100 dollars worth of parleys 7 basis points. IN 2004, in the uk, the cost of fraud was over £500 million. WHen a card is stolen, or an illegitimate twin made, most card issuers will refund some or all of the charges that the client has approved for things they did not buy. THese refunds will, in some cases, be at the expense of the factor, exceptionally in mail order cases where the broker cannot claim sight of the card. IN several cantons, sellers will lose the money if no id card was asked for, hence merchants usually require id card in these cantons. CRedit card companies customarily faith the go-between will be paid on lawful transactions anyway of whether the web browser pays their credit card bill. MOst banking jobs have their own credit card aids that handle fraud cases and monitor for any possible attempt at fraud. EMployees that are given in doing fraud displaying and study are often placed in risk supervision, fraud and approval, or cards and unsecured affairs. FRaud displaying accentuates minimizing fraud losses while making an attempt to track down those likely and contain the conditions. CRedit card fraud is a major white collar crime that has been around for many decades, even with the advent of the chip based card emv that was put into custom in some districts to prevent cases such as these.
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FOr example, you must own a go-between matters you cannot process credit card sales if you do not sell any stocks or jobs. YOur business must process at least $5,000 in monthly credit card sales, you cannot be a home based matters and there must be at least one year port on the events lease. YOu also cannot have any unresolved bankruptcies. BAckgroundcredit card factoring began about a decade ago. SInce then, it has taken the intricacy and stress out of events financial support for many small concerns owners. REcently, during the credit crunch, it has been a lifesaver for many small affairs owners, as the credit crunch has eliminated bank loans as a support option for lots of small events owners. EXplanationyou get a lump sum of cash in commerce for a small percentage of your affairs’s future credit card sales. THat means you can get cash now and pay later. ONce you receive your funds, the payback begins. WHen a purchaser uses his/her credit card to make a purchase a small percentage of the sale goes toward repaying the credit card advance and the rest of the sale goes to you. THis “split” persists to come about until the entire advance has been repaid. BEnefitsthe credit card cash advance allows small activities owners to get funds much more quickly than other methods of events backing allow in as little as 10 matters days. THe requisitions are also much looser, consenting for a larger portion of small business owners to be qualified to receive these funds. THere is no collateral requisite and borrowers do not need to have beat credit scores. SEtbacksthe credit card cash advance is limited to agents, those that operate retail and service orientated trades. THis naturally is due to the method in which the advance is repaid. THis type of matters support is also more beloved than the bank loan and meant to make a way for those who are ineligible for bank loans for one reason or another. IF you take out cash advances on one credit card that total more than $950 as of april 2016 within the 70 day period before you file your failure, collapse law accepts that the debt is nondischargeable. IF your credit card company files a a gripe for nondischargeability, you will have to defeat that surmise. TO do so, you’ll have to prove to the court that you did not intend to defraud the creditor when you took out the cash progresses. GEnerally that means showing that you proposed to repay the debt and that you did not take the money out since you could just kick the debt in your bankruptcy case. EXample 3. ANne was in a lot of debt, but she was managing it as best she could, but barely. SHe hadn’t paid her car loan in two months. HEr grandma died, and she needed to buy plane tickets to go to the funeral. SHe took a cash advance of $1,000 from her credit card to pay for the tickets and for her rental car.
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REcently, during the credit crunch, it has been a lifesaver for many small affairs owners, as the credit crunch has canceled bank loans as a aid option for lots of small concerns owners. EXplanationyou get a lump sum of cash in commerce for a small percentage of your events’s future credit card sales. THat means you can get cash now and pay later. ONce you receive your funds, the payback begins. WHen a patron uses his/her credit card to make a gain a small percentage of the sale goes toward repaying the credit card advance and the rest of the sale goes to you. THis “split” continues to befall until the entire advance has been repaid. BEnefitsthe credit card cash advance allows small concerns owners to get funds much more quickly than other methods of business funding allow in as little as 10 events days. THe appeals are also much looser, accepting for a larger portion of small affairs owners to be proper to receive these funds. THere is no collateral requisite and borrowers do not need to have best credit scores. SEtbacksthe credit card cash advance is limited to traders, those that operate retail and service sane firms. THis absolutely is due to the method in which the advance is repaid. THis type of affairs support is also more dear than the bank loan and meant to make a way for those who are ineligible for bank loans for one reason or another. ABout the author:chrystal king writes pieces about the credit card advance , the alternately method of affairs funding, for factor wealth worldwide. ARticle source: articlesbase. COm credit card cash advance revealedsmall concerns owners are using rather methods of business aid more often. STill for some, these bank loan options, such as the credit card cash advance, remain unfamiliar area. CRedit card cash advances are in the news, in ads and rapidly travel from mouth to ear amongst small concerns owners. NEvertheless, i have reason to believe that there remains a large portion of small affairs owners who have not heard about the credit card cash advance, or have heard misconstrued accounts, patterns and descriptions of it. UNfortunately, these uninformed and misled small activities owners may be missing out on extra cash to be used on events progress and development. I would like to clear up any chaos that there might be about the credit card cash advance. BAsed on these solid facts, you should be able determine whether it is the right matters patronage option for you. ELigibilityeligibility requirements for the credit card cash advance are basic. AS its name hints, except credit cards is one of the most important factors for qualification and most of the other requisitions stem from this crucial need. FOr example, you must own a go-between events you cannot process credit card sales if you do not sell any goods or aids. YOur business must process at least $5,000 in monthly credit card sales, you cannot be a home based events and there must be at least one year larboard on the matters lease. YOu also cannot have any unresolved bankruptcies.

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SOme scores look at insolvency risks, while others suppose scores for latent caters including risk scores for delinquency. FOr chest, a lender could see public records on a events credit report and decide that because of this the risk isn’t worth taking. SUppliers could view your invoice payment index as being outside of their tolerance level, and decide against going forward with a covenant. SOme of the key factors that a matters credit report could reflect and which play into affairs credit scores are: • timely payment of invoices from vendors/caterers. A report with this information may track how you pay banknotes or analyze your payment index as 30, 60, 90, 120 days from the invoice due date. • credit application, employing to what debt you modernly have v. THe concern of your unused credit, much like with particular credit coverage. • company liens and/or municipally filed legal records are occasionally used in activities credit reports. • enterprise types are laden in some reports to show any caducity that may exist in each assiduity type. THis disappearance calculus is formulated from historic data on known trade types. • proprietor hint can be used as another marker for a score or scope mention. IT is chief now more than ever that activities owners have a good handle on their individual and business credit reports. LOng gone are the days of handshake shrinks. DEcisions are based on hard facts and justifiable numbers. EArly stage affairs owners should make efforts to secure matters credit around credit cards or small installment loans. THe latter can be another easy way to begin the process of confirming matters credit. OVerall, credit will carry on to be very vital in our lives yourself and professionally. LEnders want and need the ability to measure the credit worthiness of an dissimilar or activities, which in turn affects the pliability we have in our day to day lives, and in the conditions and growth of small enterprises. WE’ve all seen the news and reports on how the “credit crunch,” as we so gently call it, is barring activities owners with good credit from acquiring support. BUt why is it so hard?WIthout even accosting the disappearing role of dependency banks in the vivacity of small companies, the simple answer is that many of these business owners don’t have the money or the time to “hurry up and wait. ” that is to say, the received lenders that are left fame want fiscal histories, lengthy concerns plans, individual collateral, and a litany of other functioning insures…and even if a matters owner does have the luxury of dedicating enough money to pull all of this simultaneously, they then find oneself waiting 90 120 days before their loan is funded.
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SOmetimes an extra collateral is required from the betrayer’s side, if the value of bonds in the account declines. MOney borrowed against bonds can be used for any of the purposes covering dressing in a business, or payment of another loan. CRedit unionsa credit union is a united productive seminary, that is owned and managed by its members, to accept savings and grant loans to the other members. IT is acted for the benefit of its members by advancing thrift, furnishing credit at reasonable rates, and provisioning other productive aids. SOme credit unions help in society increasing and range from small discretional agencies to bigger establishments. PEople who qualify for company in a credit union, are supposed to acquirement its share, in order to activate their body status, and gain advantage from the financial services which are offered. THe motion of credit unions is almost similar to that of trade banks, supplying almost every type of betrayer credit. THe business rates offered by credit unions may be somewhat lower as collated to the business banks, however, the maximum loan amount may not be as large as liberated by the latter. INsurance companiesinsurance, is a form of risk control, which is overall used to hedge against the risk of a tentative loss. AN reporting company is an entity which sells the insurance, whereas a policyholder is the one who buys it. INsurance firms are a source of credit for buyers, in case he owns procedures that include a savings element, or cash value. LIfe insurance loans carry rather low concern rates as compared to that of loans from other lending foundations. UTilization of insurance trades as a credit source, in reality includes borrowing one’s own money. ANy excellent loan amount is depreciated from the policy’s death benefit, in case the policyholder dies without paying back his credits. FInance companiesconsumer finance firms fundamentally manipulate making fixing loans and second lends. THey offer shopper loans and support for all ends, and are commonly more willing to make moderately small loans which mercantile banks frequently avoid. THey can be beneficial for some people as they do not take banks, and can approve loans for applicants with bad or no credit logs. HOwever, the worry rate charged by them are faraway higher and ancillary on separate’s credit file. IF the aspirant is having a bad credit profile, greater amount of collateral may be necessary by a finance company, for the agreement of a loan. BEfore accessioning any of the above mentioned economical constitutions for a credit, one should be sure of his needs, and should plan out the mode of repayment beforehand. IT helps the betrayer to avoid the hassles which occur on the non repayment of credits, which may also spoil his credit history.

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THe threats of taking my son and the very few things i have left have me living in fear. HE fools everyone around him into since i’m an awful person when all i ever tried to do was help him. HE is a sick and twisted man i don’t want my son to be ducked in by his disception. WHat do i do?I work hard but barely make ends meet. ARe there any ways to make this easier, for i can’t handle anymore of his abuse?I keep reading the comment on here and i didn’t mention the adultery his bizarre sex request and his drug abuse that he blames aggregate on. HE’s fooled all for years saying he’s clean and getting pity from, i call them his chearleaders by making it look like im not understanding of his craving and i’m making it hard on him. I’ve stood by him through yrs of rehab when he would hook up with all these young girls there. I think to him it felt like he was in college. HE would beg and cry to come come home, of course i took him but yet i don’t value everything and i am the abominable one when now i’m living with my parents and my two boys and when he met me i owned my own home and my vehicle out righthad wonderful credit now i’m inaugurating from zero and he still is haunting my life. MY sister is a narcissist who has caused me, and my husband, a lot of grief. FOr some time, without us realizing, she told lies about us to the others in the family who credited her even though i was yet able to prove she was wrong. SHe also maligned us both behind our backs – we’re not sure how far this has travelled but have seen some facts from family members not acknowledging gifts and not questioning us to events when we might have due to be. LUckily we live a long way off so don’t have to see her, except that my mother is elderly and still needs our support. SIs is jealous because she lives near to mom so has to do more to look after her whilst i do what i can, visit and having mom to stay when probably, along with phoning every day and helping with her resources. BUt she has publically, to my other brother, unjustifiably accused me of not doing enough to help and is winding them up to agree with her nastiness. IN the meanwhile, when she is is the mood, she is sweetness and light, pretending that nothing has occurred and that all is well, hoovering away to keep in with me. IT’s hard to know that someone can be so nasty without any encouragement or retribution and then just switch on the charm the next day. ONe problem is getting my grown up kids to value that she is so nasty as they have always only seen the smarmy, alluring side of her and some of them are in social media contact with her infants so it’s hard for them to cut off when they have had no particular abuse oneself. WE can only assume that the deep seated reason behind all of this is jealousy going back to youth – i wasn’t aware that she felt like this but there are obviously some serious shattering lines there. NOn contact is absolutely the only way to go but total cut off can’t happen as long as mom is around. THis article is very helpful.