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IF you analyse the initial contacts with your ex, you will name your guts telling you no!; learn from that. OBserve herself and what you feel and you will learn how to make healthier intelligence in alliances and lot else. I’m schooling too and even after this, i’m evolving. I believe that we need to learn exposure and that does not mean to be a prey. I’m wishing you the best. STay strong. @Alicebravo!I’m getting out of 24 years to a covert narc. THe revelation in this divorce is paralyzing at best. I just woke up from a 10 year fog, each time i rose above the fog, i battled oppression that was so thick, it smothered me. I have 4 guys, i did the offering of staying to give them succession, i was so wrong, because they all got screwed into his handling. THus, them blame me and its severed some bridges. IVe been seeking out books, and therapy, alt med behaviors, etc. I found emdr therapy to be best at finding triggers in one session!IT is truly amazing how fast you come to where it all started. MY first one took me back to the age of 5 in 10 mins!IVe been through acupuncture, chiropractors, hypnosis, and biofeedback…. IVe been 9 months without a sleep cycle 3hours in 2011, but this time around i recorded cptsd with fibromyalgia – oh so painful, ordinary now for 16 months : no good days without pain, because commonplace a piece to the puzzle being his supply pops into view. 24 years to put all together…. I cant see my mom after heart surgery, because i feel so wrong to moanin pain and all i want to do is take her pain from her and bare it with my daily agony. I just look forward to moving away up to my family, far away from him. TO sweetnlucky: this is a very hard status for a adolescent to manage emotionally. I feel for her!AS a child, you can’t even imagine the thought that a parent can actually behave so selfishly. BUt,my advice to your daughters would be to do some mental imagery with her. I have 3 teenagers and, i would advise you to have someone other than ego do this with her unless she still respects you and asks for your advice ok, when she is forthcoming to spend time with her father even if it’s just a 15 min visit have her sit in a chair with her eyes closed. HAve her pretend that she has a zipper instantly over her heart. NOw, have her unzip that zipper and reach in and grab her tender heart, which holds all of her passions and her self esteem. THen have her place this heart in a safe and lock it up. ONly she knows the mixture to get her heart out of the safe. THen explain to her that but her body is going to be with her father, all of her feeling and self esteem are locked tightly in that safe. SHe can’t get her affections hurt if they are safe and inviolably locked away. SHe can reclaim her self esteem and feelungs when she is home and in a safe place. THis is telling. I hope it will help you ;when the opportunites arise, let her know how special she is, let her know where you see her forces, and how she could build on her endowment, and that you will love her and accept her through whatever.
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